. . . AND pressing on

In case anyone else is having trouble pressing on as I have, here's a few thoughts from my journal yesterday that might help.

I feel numb with frustration. I feel so stuck here right now… more humility is needed I suppose. I feel like I’m praying for the wrong thing. There are so many aspects of every situation. I don’t think God wants solutions to be easy. He wants us to understand the depth and nuances within each situation. Sometimes recording the details of events is so overwhelmingly tedious. I tire of facing those details each day, and I dread the discipline of rehashing them here.

            OK, and coming to church should help too.... [I was traveling to church by subway while writing this. The rest I wrote that night at home.]

            It did. Well, the opening song at Seminary Graduation finally put me over the top. Sometimes you’re just so miserable that everything just looks grey and you feel so numb and caught up in an unending cycle of hurt and confusion and frustration. That’s when you just hold on and pray until the light and the peace come. For some reason that came to me today through the hymn “Let Us All Press On” as the opening song in the graduation ceremonies. 

Let Us All Press On

1.               Let us all press on in the work of the Lord, That when life is o'er we may gain a reward; In the fight for right let us wield a sword, The mighty sword of truth.

[Chorus] Fear not, though the enemy deride; Courage, for the Lord is on our side. We will heed not what the wicked may say, But the Lord alone we will obey.

2.       We will not retreat, though our numbers may be few When compared with the opposite host in view; But an unseen pow'r will aid me and you In the glorious cause of truth.

3.       If we do what's right we have no need to fear, For the Lord, our helper, will ever be near; In the days of trial his Saints he will cheer, And prosper the cause of truth.

Text and music: Evan Stephens, 1854–1930

I’m also thinking of the quote from President Hinckley that I shared last Sunday in my RS lesson:

As a Church, we encourage gospel scholarship and the search to understand all truth. Fundamental to our theology is belief in individual freedom of inquiry, thought, and expression. Constructive discussion is a privilege of every Latter-day Saint. 

But it is the greater obligation of every Latter-day Saint to move forward the work of the Lord, to strengthen His kingdom on the earth, to teach faith and build testimony in that which God has brought to pass in this, the dispensation of the fulness of times. (May 2012 New Era in this month's New Era entitled,"Any Questions?" by David A Edwards)

Sometimes you just get in a funk of asking questions of yourself and feeling overwhelmed and you need help getting back in the boat and on your way and back to work. That’s what Sundays and temples and spouses and friends of the heart are all about—all working for the Father of us all. 

Thank you Sundays and temples and spouses and friends of the heart and the Father of us all! Pressing on!

~vbb

PS
Here's another quote Rob shared this morning that might also help someone else as it helped me:

“The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude.”

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles (1917–2008), “Come What May, andLove It,” Ensign, Nov. 2008, 28.